Recent Posts

- Anna Rose Jewelry

- I heart Dreamhost!

Are you suffering from Too-Many-To-Do‘s?

May 19th, 2010 by Col

Giant Marble Boulders on Beach, Moeraki, New Zealand

Giant Marble Boulders on Beach, Moeraki, New Zealand


  • Incessant underlying low-grade tension
  • Scribbled lists on piles of post-it's and papers
  • Spinning thoughts
  • Paralysis when you think of what you need to do today
  • Overuse of the word “overwhelm”
  • Constant concern that you're forgetting something
  • Jarring awake in the middle of the night realizing you HAVE in fact forgotten something

I'm here to tell you …

Today is a brand new day and it's the perfect day for peace of mind.

Peace begins with separating out what is truly, truly important and what can fall away. And letting what can fall away fall.

Let's get this party started

If you're like me, you're probably saying something that sounds a bit like this:

“But it's ALL important!!!”

I hear ya. I'm with ya. And it's true, it totally feels that way, right?

But here's the thing: It's not that way. I know it feels that way … but it's not that way. There are certain things which, if left undone, the world would not come to an end. Really, it's true.

Imagine this:

You're having a dinner party. There's all this stuff to be done.

People to invite. Food to buy. Decorations to put up. Gift bags to assemble. Recipes to cook. Plates and cups and utensils to be laid out. Hair to be washed. Clothes to put on. Big to-do list, right?

Now just say you're jammin' along on your list and suddenly you look up and … wow, the party's starting in a half hour! Certain things would drop off the list.

And it would be ok.

I know, I know, you really want to get it all done, to have absolutely the most kick butt party in the whole wide world but …

  • Maybe it's ok for you to NOT make that crab dip your partygoers would so very much love. After all, you do already have the main course cooked and the drinks are so very delicious. And maybe it's not ideal but maybe, just maybe, it would be totally fine.
  • Maybe when your first guest comes they could help you put the utensils out. And maybe it's not ideal but maybe, just maybe, it would be totally fine.
  • Maybe a few of the things from your massive to-do list don't get done. And maybe it's not ideal but maybe, just maybe, it would be totally fine.

Separate the stones

Envision a glass jar. You've got stones and pebbles and sand. What's the most efficient way to fill up that jar? If you fill up your jar with sand first, you'll never get your stones in there.

Put the stones in first, then the pebbles. Last, the sand can flow in between the spaces.

First, let's get acquainted with your stones, your pebbles and your sand. To determine which is which, ask yourself, “If this did not get done, what's the worst that would happen?”

Essential stones:

Let's face it, although very little on our to-do list is truly, truly life-altering, certain things definitely do feel that way. Essential stones are the things which, if not done … well, the party just would not happen.

These are the things that would make the most impact on your desired end result. They do not merely add to the experience … If one were to drop off the list, there would be no experience.

Example: If you were giving a party and didn't invite anyone … no party. Sure sign that this is an essential stone.


Ask yourself the question, “Will this matter a year from now?”

Don't Sweat the Small Stuff

Pebbles do feel important but if one were to not fit into your jar, it wouldn't be the end of the world. There would still be a party.

These things may feel like necessities but if one had to drop off, it would be ok. A different experience but ok.

Example: Of course it's our intention for your guests to have something to drink but if they didn't, would there still be a party? Of course there would!


Sand is the minutia. These are the tiny details, the experience-enhancers, the wishes or the add-ons.

Examples: The tenth appetizer. The tea lights placed with care on the tables. The little place cards telling each guest where to sit.

Choose and let go.

You will never get there, so enjoy your journey.


You do not need to be in charge of doing every single last thing that can possibly be done.

Have you ever noticed … when you finally check off one to-do list, before you even breathe a sigh of relief there's another list of to-do's ready and waiting?

Your in-box will never be empty and you will never get it all done. Make peace with that.

The belief that you do need to get everything done and that you can actually one day accomplish that “all-is-done” state … This is what keeps you in stress.

And by you I mean me. 😉  I was the worst of the worst. Talk about underlying stress. I still go there sometimes and so I make it a point to remind myself of this daily … and each time that I do, I feel relief.

Choose and then let go. Separate out the important things and the rest, delegate to the universe.

This is the path to peace.

A few final words of wisdom …

The journey is the reward

“If you're obsessed with getting everything done, you'll never have a sense of well-being! In reality, almost everything can wait. If I remind myself frequently that the purpose of life isn't to get it all done but to enjoy each step along the way and live a life filled with love, it's far easier for me to control my obsession with completing my list of things to do.”

Richard Carlson
Don't Sweat the Small Stuff

“You will never get it all done. How does that feel? If that feels like, ‘Oh good' … then you are remembering that the destination has never been what it's about. The destination just gives you something to focus upon so that energy flows, so that your journey is exhilarating.”

—  Abraham-Hicks
Excerpted from the workshop in Portland, OR on Tuesday, May 1st, 2001

. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

Special thanks to Jeanna Gabellini for imparting her wisdom (inspired by Stephen Covey / Seven Habits of Highly Effective People) … and for allowing me to share her right-on metaphor of the party. Download Jeanna's FREE teleclass “Ready, set…VISUALIZE” at Abundance Abounds.

. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

Save/Share to ...

Posted in free gifts for YOU, tips 'n tools | 12 Comments »

12 Responses

  1. Sheryl Brown Says:

    Hey Col,
    This was so beautifully written – essential for us to take heed on this – enjoy each moment unrushed…!

  2. Harry Beam Says:

    Hi Beautiful,how do you like that. I have my first website,this is my first little business,I’m contacting you,well first because I miss seeing your videos and blogs

  3. Jenny Says:

    Heyas. Just stopping by after going through some old comments. Good to see your blog is still around. A lot of them arent. Makes me sad :(

    Anyway have a great weekend 😀

  4. Sheryl Brown Says:

    Hey Jenny, I’m pretty sure Col will be around with her gorgeous blog and website for many years to come..!

    (She’s so young she has many years to come.. ;D And she’s so wise, she would never stop sharing her wisdom with us.. heheh..!)

  5. Col Says:

    Good to see you Jenny, thanks for coming by to visit!

    Sheryl, you are so precious … you always, always make my heart smile, thank you for that. I think I’d like to start sharing my wisdom more often … I used to write whenever I would learn something (what’s that, every DAY, right? 😉 incessantly learning! Well, you are inspiring me to do it more, thank you for that! xo

  6. harry beam Says:

    Hi Col I know your. doing well just wanted to say Hi and I miss knowing what’s going on with you and Elaina if you see tell her I Love both of you and wish you the best. I ‘ve written on here before and not heard anything oh well that was then and this is now.bye Harry

  7. Col Says:

    Harry my friend! So nice to see you here … I clicked your link and didn’t find you, otherwise I’d have left a message for you on *YOUR* web site. Take good care of yourself and I’d love to see some more of your art one day!

  8. harry beam Says:

    Hiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii. Col you know me and computers.I’m. Writting this on my phone Droidx. My computers in a box I have to take it to my nephews to use it. I have the new Abraham vortex cd. I listen to all there videos on my phone.but after all. these years and a few more thousands in programs User in the same old house when we met

  9. harry beam Says:

    Now having said all of that wanting a way to send Love to the worldand not being able to connect with anyone, I wait to get the answer, where are that.. well I use several programs that make thing appear that I’m looking for so today sitting im my backyard doing my grounding I read am email from Lynn Mctagert.http/ is what I’ve been looking for Please check it out this is what YOU ARE ALL ABOUT! Now gotta see if I can scrapppppppppppe up the money just in time to make it in.hope to see you there.Love your friend Harry

  10. harry beam Says:

    Hi Col I don’t know how often you come here but Lynne Mctaggart course is life changing I hope you can join us. Her commiumity page is like BLC. But much better over 5000 on there you could really get the word out there on what your working on.Hope to see you there.I tried to dreads my long blog sounds to depressing. Could you erease it.Please If you can’t do the class get the book the Bond it will change deal with people.Its all about Love and connection,Its know accident I keep finding You,Bye Harry

  11. Col Says:

    Hi Harry! I’m so glad you’re getting something wonderful from Lynne’s course. I’ll go take a look. The thing I really loved about the comment you asked me to delete was this piece: “I don’t get upset in traffic anymore, they cut me off and I just smile and say he must need to be somewhere” … That is beautiful, Harry! I do the very same thing. It really helps keep yourself in a good place, right? Keep doing that. I honestly don’t even care whether it’s “true” or not, as long as I get to continue feeling calm and happy, that’s all that matters! It is so worth it!

  12. harry beam Says:

    Hi Col its always great to hear from you. I had to remind myself that when I get between meals or eat the wrong thing that’s when the negative stuff comes up and later when I read it it makes little sense.So I working on watching my intake of strange stuff. I just got a small bottle of black mica.check it out at longitivy. Com. The stuff cleans up any water and you can clean your veggies in it. For months check it out. I ‘m using it to clear up years of inhealing who knows what doing construction work. Gotta get back to work.Bye Harry

Leave a comment. I'd love to hear from you!

Please note: Comment moderation is enabled and may delay your comment just a tad! No need to resubmit your comment ... It will appear when the time is right! ;)